Will and Krista

Fun Times at the Clinic!

2011-03-07T13:22:00.002-09:00

.....zzzzzz....

Well, okay, that was sarcastic. But it is good news--everything is fine. The doctor said that other than a common infection, Will has a healthy colon, which is always great news. :)

Will was in no pain at all, in fact, as he was waking up, he asked me several times if they had performed the procedure yet. (Ha, Ha, Ha!)

Will, on the gurney after his very First Colonoscopy.

Later on that day, we ate at a buffet and went to the movies. Compared to a lot of things we have been through in the past few years, last Monday was actually a lot of fun for both of us.

I was just glad he was okay, and he was ultra nice to me that day. I would say it was the drugs, but I think Will is just discovering how sweet it can be to have a Sweetie.

Date Night!

2011-01-22T09:05:00.000-09:00

True to his word, Will and I had our very first SCHEDULED Date Night last night. He brought me Irises!

Irises for date night

My Sweetie is so sweet! I have to brag about how wonderful Will has been over the past few months. He smiles, he's affectionate, he's been getting sleep, eating better, and choosing not to externalize his freak-out sessions. He tells me that he has "let go" of a lot of things he can't control.

To be frank, I want to scream "WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?!" at the top of my lungs, but I'm having that party inside of myself, and enjoying the attention and harmony.

We even see eye-to-eye on the finances. I'm in heaven, and I love my husband.

Just thought you should know.

Will wearing a hat I almost finished last month

Brand New Start

2011-01-20T07:45:00.000-09:00

Well, here we are.

It's another year, and January 2011 is almost over.

Crazy!

Will's first semester of school was pretty tough. Then again, no one said working a salaried job and going to school and existing all at the same time was going to be easy. Somehow, we made it thru the holidays, and here we are, still together, and actually better than ever.

Washburn excused his bad grades on account of his demanding job, and he is once more enrolled in school! Yaaayyyy! He's taking Accounting over again, a Business Information Systems class, and, of course, his beloved ORGAN!

and speaking of organ--

Before the winter break, Will auditioned for the Music Department, wishing to add a Minor in Organ...well, we just got word a couple days ago that he was ACCEPTED! So in addition to his Major in Business Finance, he will have a Minor in Organ Performance..."in about 25 years," Will likes to say.

We're trying to think of ways to make accomplishing his degree something that happens sooner. Will is changing his study habits--he's staying on campus after class to finish his assignments, work out at the campus gym and practice on the school organ. (this prevents him from watching tv...I think it will make a big difference in his grades). He's also looking for opportunities to build businesses for folks he knows with a little money to invest...possibly leading to him quitting his full-time job. As his own boss he could more easily work day classes into his schedule. We'll see how that goes.

I'm also doing my part.

I have been on a super-duper break from my beloved blogging to completely re-vamp the purpose and look of my online life. I've been reading a lot about online marketing and wealth building and following one's dreams...and I'm finally to the point where I'm going for it.

For those of you who follow me or Will on Facebook and/or Twitter, you know that after Will got his raise (in early December 2010), I quit my job as a school bus driver to pursue writing and online marketing full-time. I feel pretty self-conscious of my attempts, but it's growing on me. I spent the first two months cleaning the house, making Will lunch and trying to get thru the holidays married. I was successful. The house is clean, Will is finally eating more salad, and our communication is finally experiencing a breakthrough--thank God.

More updates to come. I promise.

Visit Will's new website, promoting his Piano Teaching! --LINK

and you can catch me HERE for now...or my body image blog HERE.

Glad to be back! :)

Choir

2010-08-01T19:07:00.000-08:00

Will is now conducting a Cantata that the Topeka Wards are participating in. He is very happy to be at the conductor's stand again.
(this is a video I took to submit for a documentary ...you'll have to excuse our singing. this was the first time we had ALL seen the music.)

Also, Will got approved for student loans and got enrolled in School! WOW! It's actually happening! Will is so excited, and I am so proud of him. His weeks are very full. He still works overtime at his job quite a bit, and has a very full schedule in the evenings with piano lessons. Adding school on top of that will really stretch him, but I think Will is going to be so motivated by all the learning, he will really pull through.

Summer is almost over. I go back to school bus driving in a few weeks. I try not to focus on my job. I have been focusing quite a bit on studying internet marketing. I'm so obsessed with it, I think I could have some very decent success. I think I may like to eventually become a freelance marketing consultant once I get good at it. Anyway, until that time when I'm making more than enough to cover my current paychecks and health plan through my current job, I'll just have to enjoy my experiences as a bus driver. It's all good. I have a feeling I won't be driving the big, yellow limmo much longer.

Yay, Will's finally going back to school!!!

School

2010-07-21T14:41:00.000-08:00

Will is so excited to be starting school soon! The major he has decided upon (Business Finance) actually allows him to go to school in the evenings. Also, Will discovered that he needs a certain number of Music electives to fulfill as part of his major--UGH! Twist his arm! lol

Of course, he immediately thought to take organ. He e-mailed the organ instructor and crossed his fingers, hoping he would be allowed to do so as a Business major...amazingly, he was approved! Not only that, but since he's not majoring in Organ, he doesn't have to audition! All he has to do is set up the class and he gets to play and practice to his heart's content and get credit for it!

Will has been very happy lately--very attentive to his moods. As a result, our communications have been much more pleasant. We love being around each other!

I have been continuing my education as well, albeit an alternative education. I'm learning about internet marketing so that our business ventures will be able to thrive. For some reason, I feel very passionately about being financially successful and healthy. I can't seem to shake the desire to achieve those things--to live a life of health, abundance, art and beauty is all I can think about. So I'm learning how to allow that to happen in my life.

Will is finally to the point where he's baby hungry. He wants to be a Daddy pretty badly. We talked it over, taking into consideration our current financial status and difficulty in concieving. We decided the best thing we could do to increase our fertility and overall happiness is to achieve the highest level of health possible. Once we have been free from excess fat and other physical issues for a while, then we can look into medical help again if we still need help by then.

Until the blessed day when we get little ones of our own, we're content with our kitties and our nieces and nephews.

Life is sweet right now, and we're doing a pretty darn good job of making that the norm.
Hooray!

Fourth of July

2010-07-14T14:35:00.000-08:00

Will was invited to play the organ at his Grandparents' church in Overland Park for the Fourth of July. I had plenty of opportunities to take a picture, and I DIDN'T! Can you believe that? well, here is Will with our organ here at home (since most of you haven't seen that.):

He had a great time. The new Pastor of their church gave a really great sermon and played the guitar. It was cool. Everyone loved Will's performance.

We ate out with Grandma and Grandpa, and drove around Merriam to see the 2,000 Flags:

Then, since we were so close to OP, we decided to descend upon Becky. Her living room was full of boxes. She showed us what her new house looks like, and suddenly I wished I was moving in with my sisters, too. I decided we can keep our husbands in the house next door, where they can fend for themselves. (sounds like a fun movie plot...)

Will cought the silly bug from Becky and her cats. We talked about cat breeding. It was fun.

We had a great time with Grandma and Grandpa! Thanks for the good times!

the cake

2010-06-08T09:30:00.000-08:00

Munchers Bakery...butter cream frosting for anniversary number three. Finally we were in the vicinity to get the real deal.

I took it upon myself to make sure we had a fun anniversary this year. Will received half a dozen donuts from Munchers at about 2pm on June 2...he proudly carried the white box topped with a couple new gel pens and a ridiculously conspicuous mylar balloon that said "love and kisses." I should have taken a picture, but I was cramped in the car preparing it, and I didn't want the frosting to melt in the heat of the car.I picked him up late from work, but I looked like this:

so he didn't mind so much.

The house was clean, and the table was strewn with candles and the delicious Muncher's cake on the table. I cooked him tacos made with organic beef and salsa from organic tomatoes that actually tasted like tomato. Then, we watched Live Free or Die Hard. I was leaving the agenda for that night up to him. I figured we would watch the movie, eat cake and zonk out...it went almost like that, with a bit of lovin' thrown in. (tee-hee-hee!)

Happy Anniversary, Sweetie.

Memorial Day 2010 in Pictures

2010-06-08T09:03:00.002-08:00

Special thanks to Renee...thanks for the beef and the strawberries. You're the BEST!!!

Specters from the Ether

2010-06-08T08:44:00.002-08:00

After 15 years, my Uncle and Aunt descended from the Ether to make contact with us! Here is my mother, her brother and his wife outside the restaurant where we all had a delicious Italian dinner in their honor.

All kinds of things have changed. Almost all of my siblings and I are married, and so are my cousins. I was delighted to talk to my uncle again, this time as an adult. I found out he's actually a really fun guy...and my aunt is one of the sassiest and most caring women on the planet. I love them both. I wish I could have had them around as I was growing up. The years had brought them more happiness and peace...what a blessing. We discovered that they were taking the 'long way' to their son's house and doing genealogical research as they went. That evening, my mother and I got to pick their brains about the past 15 years. Best of all, I got to hear a lot about my Mom's side of the family...people I came from that I never knew and still feel very distant from. Now that's what Genealogy is about.

Will and I had a little tiff, and so while I was at the store I bought him this happy summer shirt to cheer him up... only 5 bucks! For RAYON! I am such a great bargain hunter. (actually, a few days later, I wore the shirt myself...lol...it's rayon! You can't let rayon just sit in a closet! Not during Summer! )
Aloha, Will! :)

Pre-Furniture Party

2010-06-08T08:17:00.003-08:00

This is my brother and his wife. They bought a house.

Before all the furniture was moved in, they threw a party...a pre-furniture party...because that's how we all roll. There was shrimp and old school Nintendo games. We went into the attic full of dust and wooden splinters...my brother told me all the plans he had to finish the attic, making it into the coolest reading nook of all time. We sat on the floor with friends and talked. Will played piano that my brother managed to work into the house deal. It was badly out of tune, but a pleasant juxtaposition to the sounds of Super Mario 3. One friend even graded short college essays written in hot pink gel pen. (Were we ever that young?)

Eventually, the shrimp was gone, and everyone had tasted the strange Kale and Beet salad I had brought, agreeing that it was not quite as bad to taste as it was to look at. Before departure, it was time for a haphazard group photo.

Happy first house, guys.

Next party on the horizon: the pre-TRON party...this time at our house.

(...we have the biggest TV...)

Blue Skies

2010-05-06T15:05:00.000-08:00

Lovin' my Honey, lovin' the spring, looking forward to summer!

How Did We Get So OLD???

2010-04-20T15:53:00.000-08:00

Thank goodness for great photographers and excellent lighting! Were it not for my sister, photos of me these days would show a lot of wrinkles and my huge, fat blob-iness.

Everything is beginning to settle down...finally.

Will was given a bonus and a raise at work and soon he will be on salary. This means his company will be able to ask him to work virtually any time they want...officially. He's been doing that informally for a while now, and altho he has been rather tired, he hasn't complained much. My husband is one hard-workin' man, and in this company I think he has really found his niche. It's very reassuring for me to know that he finds his work fulfilling.

Over and over, Will has determined and re-determined what he wants to study in school. I turned 31 last week, and Will's 31st is coming in the fall. I think something finally clicked in his brain--

'Dude, I'm old, and if I'm gonna do something with my life, I need to choose the most efficient path!'

I have been experiencing the same reality check. How did the time slip away so fast? And when did I get so OLD-LOOKING? Pictures from 3 years ago look like high school compared to now! Today, as I contemplated things, I realized that the only thing that has ever kept the two of us from realizing great things is our own doubts and fears. Sounds clichet, but it's literally true. Lack of decision is a fantastic excuse for trying nothing, and therefore failing at nothing...which is actually failing at everything.

We chase fleeting time through our fear to the other side--a satisfaction with life--a happiness...

What's Up?

2010-04-03T08:20:00.005-08:00

(Will, February)

We're glad it's Spring. We're glad it's warm--Will is very happy that he is able to wear shorts and flip flops again. We both suffered so much with the cold and snow this winter, we both intend to lay out this summer and get tan. And of course, Will wants to go swimming ASAP. :)

Our lives, both emotional and temporal, have seemed very polar over the past few years. Since our wedding, I have been privilaged to discover how very simple and complicated my husband is. And me? Well, I discovered that I do know myself, but I haven't been acting like it the past few years. Finally understanding all of this has made our communication exponentially better, and we are benefiting greatly because of that.

We have been encouraging each other to deal with stress in ways other than eating and spending, so we're getting happier, thinner and richer--imagine that! LOL

I think Will has finally come to terms with the fact that we will have to work consistently for a few years to pay down all the debt we owe, and that it's possible to be happy with a simple, frugal life. This has been a great lesson to us, and I am greatful that once it's over we can move on.

Work, Work, Work is what Will is doing lately. In fact, he is at work today in addition to the 40 hours of overtime he has put in this week already. In contrast, I am looking forward to summer when I will have 2 1/2 months of free time to do whatever I want!

I get to finish a novel! At least, I'll really give it my best effort. I am not known to finish many big projects, so this will be a challenge for me.

(Us, on our date to the Museum, February)

We love our family and friends, and hope you're all doing well!

:)

The 'Homies' Downstairs: WWGD?

2010-04-01T09:24:00.003-08:00

Okay,

I know that we are paying a very tidy sum to live in this apartment complex, and until last month, everything has been great. We lived in a reletively quiet building beneath a family and across from an old lady that uses a cane. We know we live in a place that also houses folks that are not really our type...but we leave them alone, and they have left us alone...until last month.

I don't really know how many people live downstairs, because there's so many people going in and out. The best I can guess is that there's at least three 19-year-old white boys and a girlfriend or two down there at any given time. 12pm: BOOM BOOM BOOM with the stereo. 9pm: BOOM BOOM BOOM with the stereo. 10:30 pm on a weeknight: BOOM BOOM BOOM, rattle rattle, their five friends and their girls come over in a truck and yell at each other thru windows. ALL hours of the day and night: very noticable wafts of cigarette smoke coming from below. 7pm on a Monday while we're holding FHE with Will's parents: skunky POT SMOKE wafts up into our living room. Just a couple days ago, Will was walking to the bus stop and one of the guys was outside with his girlfriend--completely without provocation, the guy derogatorily called Will a homosexual. Yesterday, we noticed there were tennis shoes dangling from the telephone wire across from our building.

>sigh<

Isn't pot still illegal in Kansas? We complained once to the office of our complex, but that was before the pot. Something tells me if I try to complain to the office again I'll get about as much help as we did last time... "well, we can move you to another building." No, not really, thanks. I would rather live in a place that doesn't allow illegal activity on its premises...but we really can't afford to move, and I don't want to go through the hassle of moving my stuff from apartment to apartment all over the complex.

What Would Grandma Do?
Actually, I remember her telling me a story about when a big family of troublemakers moved in next door to her. She said she started praying every day that they would move away so that she wouldn't have to. I can't remember how long it took, but they did move away in a very short period of time.

Better get prayin'.

Wonderful Valentine's Day

2010-02-13T05:35:00.002-09:00

I let Will decide how we were going to spend this weekend, if we were going to do anything at all...and he did come up with something wonderful!

Last night, we spent time with each other privately, and watched a movie.

Today, we are headed to the Nelson Art museum in Kansas City! I have never been there, and it's so romantic and thoughtful and classy of Will to take me there. I'm thrilled!

We invited our friend Becky to the museum with us, so this should be twice as fun. I can't wait! Yay to Will for planning this!

We've been really stressing ourselves out with one thing or another. Will is still deciding wether or not it would be possible to get a second job. He works so much overtime at his day job, it would be difficult to try and make it to a night job on time with consistency. Will just wants things to be better, and to be better NOW. I can't blame him--I want the same thing. Will fixes everything with money and work. I know work is what he does best, so I have tried to be supportive and allow him to do whatever he feels like he needs to do.

So far, letting go is working.

Debt in our way

2010-02-08T08:36:00.002-09:00

Will is in the process of getting another job to pay off debt. Seems like nothing can happen until the debt is gone, and Will has no peace while it exists.

So, soon he will have another job and I will have a lot of free time on my hands.

Altho I am sure that we will take the time to eat plenty of food. During times like these, one can never be too well-protected against sadness, so we like to keep ourselves insulated with at least 100lbs. of excess fat. Me, I like to pack on a little extra just to buffer me when I'm at home or when I have a bad dream.

Ever have one of those years?
Ever have one of those years a couple of years in a row?

If you know any good jokes, or know of any really hilarious things on Youtube, now would be a really good time to forward those links.

The Blue Moon

2010-01-01T06:30:00.002-09:00

...did NOT see us standing alone, without a dream in our hearts or without loves of our own.

Will and I were in each other's arms as the fireworks went off last night, full of love and optomism for the new year. He and I have so many dreams for our future and we have finally narrowed it down to a few attainable goals.

Right now, we are thankful.

Happy New Year to you and yours.

Little Kitty Snores...

2009-12-31T09:39:00.003-09:00

I guess ANY time a male and a female sleep together the male is oblidged to snore, no matter the species.

:) lol...the advantages of staying up late, owning two adorable cats and having a camera handy.

which one?

2009-12-31T08:27:00.002-09:00

Will is in the process of choosing a martial art.

He doesn't like a whole lot of contact with his opponent, and wants to be able to learn a weapon and do a lot of punching and kicking.

Regardless of what he chooses, I am determined that he use that stinkin' Gi for more than Halloween 2010.

Any suggestions?

Love is Stronger Than Pride

2009-12-30T06:28:00.002-09:00

Love Is Stronger Than Pride

The holiday was very fun for us. Will and I enjoyed seeing his siblings and our little nieces on his side. We were also able to enjoy time with my siblings and our nephew on my side. Lots of people, lots of snow, lots of food.

We spent the night away from our house twice, once because our car couldn't make it through a 7-foot snow drift, and the other time, we just wanted to see a late movie.

Will and I have been taking turns being sick. I was first, and now that I'm over it, it's Will's turn. The poor guy has been hacking for the past three days.

Will's favorite present was from his Aunt and Uncle, and surprisingly simple: a burgudy, insulated hoodie from Old Navy. He LOVES that thing. I was actually amazed and delighted to recieve exactly what I wanted for Christmas: FCBD Zills, Avocados, and a Sock Monkey.

That's right--I said Sock Monkey. I love him. I named him "Steve." He came with Bananagrams.

More than any present Will and I recieved, we appreciated the gift we gave each other: a week full of smiles and kisses and love-making and patience. The last few months, we have not been kind to ourselves or each other. It seems that we each are too protective of our past wounds, and generally do not have the ability to be spontaneously kind, loving or open with each other. But with conscious effort, there is peace and love between us.

Love is stronger than pride.
(<3)

"FOR THE HONOR OF GRAYSKULL!!!"

2009-12-15T08:31:00.003-09:00

This Saturday, Will's youngest sister (age 7) stayed over at our place while Dad was at the temple, etc. Naturally, she became bored after 30 minutes of stringing beads and drawing with crayons, and just HAD to watch something resembling TV. We don't have a TV, and don't ever intend to get one, but we remember how importaint TV was to us when we were kids, and just how much darn fun it was to incinerate those brain cells, so Will got on Hulu.

"What do you want to watch?" he asked.
She said, something with a warrior princess.
Will knew just the one.

She is now addicted to She-Ra Princess of Power. She had never seen anything so cool in her life. She watched several episodes. Altho I am dismayed that TV still won out for entertainment, I was so proud exposing her to vintage, cartooney goodness.

Wax On, Wax Off!

2009-09-30T16:41:00.004-08:00

Will starts Judo classes tonight!

He has been talking about taking some form of matial art since we got married, and tonight he is finally starting! What a wonderful feeling to see him rush off to this class tonight. (Will and I both seem to be active on a more regular basis if we're involved with a group...this is a really good thing.)

Will says that he wants to feel powerful, learn to focus his "chi" (life force energy), and know how to kick someone's butt if he's ever threatened. Personally, I think it's the cool clothes. All month long it's been "gi" this and "gi" that, and "I can't wait 'till I get my gi," etc.

For those of you who are martial artistically uninnitiated like me, this is a Gi:

I mean, really--who wouldn't want to walk around in this thing?
HAAAAYA!

Will is 30!

2009-09-28T10:36:00.003-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WILL!

Payless Co. gave Will a great birthday present last week--A JOB!
That's right, he was officially offered the job he has been doing for the past month or so. WAHOO! We love insurance and paid sick leave and stuff like that!

Last Friday, we had a great party at our awesome apartment. We invited my siblings and his parents and my mom and pretty much anyone else related to us over for a HUGE Hand and Foot Tournament. (some of us just played 21 and tried to play poker.)

It was LOTS of fun, and best of all, it left Will smiling for days afterward.

The next night, Saturday, Will's sister gave birth to her first baby girl, and so I guess Will also got a new niece for his birthday, too! (lol)

Happy birthday, Will!

Fuzzy and Rosy All Over

2009-09-21T09:54:00.003-08:00

To my delight, Will made a concious decision this week to do little things to make me feel special and loved and valued.

It worked.

So amazing how just a few days of smiles and sweetness and three minutes spent holding me in the morning before he goes to work can make me feel like the most loved person on the earth. That little bit of energy he infused me with over the past few days has multiplied inside me and I have spirit to dance and smile and feel good again.

I intend to return the favor immediately so that the feeling will get bigger and stronger.

So, we're back...and Life is a Cookie

2009-09-16T19:09:00.004-08:00

Well, those few months in Alaska this Summer were an adventure.

Forgive the length of this post--I assume if you are at all interested in knowing the three month gap, you won't mind:

I think Will and I have really had our fill of that kind of "adventure." Somehow, "things" just haven't seemed to slow down, calm down or settle down. Treading water as the deluge fills the house, slow dancing in a burning room, all that.

...ALL that.

I don't know how Will is deciding to deal with all we've been thru, but I am trying to remain "solution oriented." Meaning, I don't really see any point in rolling around in misfortune and focussing on suffering. To that end, I will be very general and brief about our summer;

We started out the summer with gusto, and actually were doing very well. Our lodgings were very expensive and not that great, so we eventually moved into a tent. Before moving into our tent (which was a great improvement) we did happen to somehow acquire a HUGE bill for GB overage on the internet accout at our landlady's house. This bill came to light just as Will's boss was starting to severely dislike him for no apparent reason. In the midst of trying to settle this bill with a friend of ours, Will was fired and officially given no reason for being fired. I was still working as a tourguide and liking it very much, but due to all the drama we endured, and due to the fact that our plans to eliminate our debt by the end of the summer were shot, we decided to cut our losses and go back to Kansas...catching my maternal grandmother's funeral along the way.

Whew! We arrived in Topeka about 6 weeks ago. Will's parents were kind enough to let us stay in their house for a week and a half until we got moved into an apartment. Thank God we were able to pick up right where we left off with the jobs we had before. I was able to drive school bus just as soon as school started, and Will was hired back to the Payless HQ within a few weeks.

So here we are in our new apartment...we even adopted a kitten and paid a pet deposit as if to say to the universe, "NO MORE! WE ARE NOT MOVING AGAIN!" But the apartment has had a roach problem since the day we signed the lease, and since then we have had problems with the shower, the hot and cold water, and there was a flood in the apartment upstairs that has now stained our walls, warped some of our wall frames and threatened to be an electrical hazard.

We're already thinking about moving AGAIN.

Our kitty has been sick, I have been sick with a nasty cold for the past week, and then only this Monday I sprained my ankle very badly. I've been in bed for three days.

That's just me. Will has been stressing over finances and stressing over the roaches, and generally enduring me...sigh. We were doing so well with our communication in Skagway! I have been so disgusted with my emotional volatility and with Will's reaction to my stress/grief/frustration cocktail, that I just can't seem to find a solution upon which to focus.

So what am I doing? I'm huddled in a corner mumbling to myself "Mek-alek-a-halivad beem-sala-beem..." I know it's just a comedy, but sometimes I wonder, is Life really a cookie?

There was never a marriage in more dire need of laughter than this one!

Little by little, we're trying to find little things we can chuckle about, little things to be greatful for. They're sparse, and I'm starting to wonder if they moved in with Santa Clause and unicorns, but here and there, we do find laughter.

Very soon, "things" will get better. Not sure how, but they will.

Moving in with Spock

2009-09-15T15:35:00.002-08:00

This is our beautiful new baby! It's a boy! :) (well, at least he used to be-tee-hee!)

We named him Spock because his little kitten ears were so big, and because he moves at warp speed and because he's "fascinating."

He's such a good kitty, too. He has been sick lately, and adjusting to this new environment. So, Spock is giving us great practice being parents. (Not that one can ever be fully prepared for the experience.) Feed Spock, play with Spock, change Spock's litter, give Spock his meds, love Spock, stop Spock from ripping up the carpet, etc.

While we are somewhat on the subject of kids...no kids for us yet--still trying. Will's sister is due in a week or so and my own sister is due in about a month. Not only that, it seems everyone is getting pregnant these days. I wouldn't be surprised if America was having another baby boom. At work, I was covering for one woman gone on maternity leave, and there is another one leaving just about a week after she returns! That's a lot of babies!

Life has been so unstable for us since we got married that although I yearn to join my relatives and friends in the fertility fiesta, I am glad that we have not been able to concieve just yet. I could wait a bit longer.

I hear that pets help to lower the blood pressure and relieve stress. We could definitely use less stress, and I think Spock will definitely help us in that department...

as soon as he stops pooping on the floor.

:)

June 2, 2009--Dessert

2009-06-17T19:51:00.003-08:00

Strawberry swirl-ish cake from Sugar Mama's in Skagway, AK.

My teeth match my shirt.

Yeah...we pooed electric green for several days afterward.
No cake next year!

Well, maybe just a small one from Muncher's Bakery...

June 2, 2009--Our Second Anniversary!

2009-06-17T19:19:00.003-08:00

The day started out kinda stinky. Will had done something that hurt my feelings that morning just before he ran off to work. When I got off work that day, I was still upset, and I tried to be anywhere but home when he finally got off work. Finally I decided that if there was any chance of us having a happy Anniversary, I would have to just let it go. I figured that would be his gift from me--allowing his assenine behavior to slide this time.

Finally, Will called to try and locate me. I told him where I was, and he said he would drive to meet me. I continued to be aloof, and strolled down the street, la-dee-dah. Suddenly, I had the feeling I was being followed, and before I could turn to look, Will grabbed me from behind! HE took me up in his arms and kissed me and kissed me until I was laughing. He said he loved me a million times, and happy anniversary...it was probably my favorite part of the day.

Here we are in the car, just after that:

We took ourselves out to The Stowaway Cafe, which is probably the best restaurant in town. We had THE most heavenly spinach salad and halibut ever.

My Will.

The mermaid statue outside the restaurant. (I nicknamed it the 'Mermaid Cafe.')

I did my hair and put on makeup just for the occasion. You know what was so great? Will actually noticed and appreciated my effort. Will was absolutely extatic to see me. I hadn't seen him that excited in quite some time.

Two years! Yay! We made it! Things just keep getting better.

Trip to Whitehorse Yesterday (...a beautiful feelin'...)

2009-05-24T16:01:00.004-08:00

(Will and Emerald Lake)

These were the only pictures I took, and I had to force myself to take them. (When you help tourists take pictures all day, you get a bit sick of cameras.) We saw about 3 bear and 1 Porcupine on our way to and back. Whitehorse is about 110 miles north of Skagway, and also has the closest WalMart and movie theatre. We watched the new Star Trek movie, which I thought was so awesome in spite of the obvious juggling of time and space to make the "new adventures of Kirk and Spock" possible. Hey, it was cool effects and the acting didn't stink badly at all. We had fun. I bought yarn and Will got a jacket that makes him look posh just like his brother Metro. Will has really trimmed up around the waist, and I swooned at him in this new jacket. The exchange rate makes it so that we spend "less" money. ...so we end up spending more because we're spending less... lol. I just tried not to blow ALL of my tip money.

(Emerald Lake...photos entirely untouched. Incredible color, huh?)

We're doing so well. Our relationship has been healed. We love and understand each other. We have been focussing on gratitude and returning honor to God for all we have been blessed with. The land around us, each other, all the resources we're being given to help pay off our debt. We're looking forward to a really great summer, now that it is upon us.

For the past few weeks, Will and I have been batting around the idea of starting an Organic Food store. This is something that fits right in with the direction I have wanted to go in for years. Will, on the other had, has been very troubled for the past year or so. It has been difficult for him to face the fact that his 20's are almost over and he doesn't have a degree. In addition, the field he wanted to go into (Architectural Engineering) will take so long to school and intern for, he sees now that it would be better to move forward with something else.

Will has made it a matter of sincere thought and prayer. We discussed it at length yesterday as we drove 2 hours up and 2 hours back. Finally last night, we offered a prayer of thanks for our rich blessings and marital peace and also the answer as to what would be good for Will to persue. Will has decided to get a Business degree and devote the rest of his time to opening a Natural Food Store in the Topeka area. I'm totally excited!!! I get to stay in the Topeka area to be with my sister and her baby on the way, and I get to persue performing with the bellydancing troupe I belong to, and I get to help my husband persue the only dream he has spoken of consecutively for the past year: owning his own business.

The idea is still in the fetal stages, but we both have a great feeling about it, and know things will go our way... I make Will sing this song for me whenever he gets bummed out. It seems to do the trick. :) We're so in love--our second anniversary is on June 2, 2009.

(The lake is purple in some places)

Like my new hat? I had to buy one. As you can see, touring has turned me pretty pink, and you can't see, but my hair is bleached from the northern sun--very strong! This isn't the best angle for either of us, but we were too tired to try harder. If you catch us when we're fully awake, we both look happier and very vibrant and healthy. Everyone should be able to see land like this and breathe fresh air and drink glacial water. >sigh< One day.

Wish you all were here.

Hike to Lower Lake--photo montage

2009-04-28T13:45:00.002-08:00

(Link to the video on Youtube)

busy, busy (and other ways to make money)

2009-04-22T15:18:00.003-08:00

Will has been working very hard at his job. Thankfully, he has had help from L, and she is a very good worker. They have done a lot to get ready for the tourist season in a shorter amount of time. This has allowed Will to feel less pressured and his temperament has been much more agreeable.

Regrettably, Will has also found much more time to worry about stuff that he can't fix or rush to finish. He's concerned about our debt and the fact that we are still not yet able to pay more than the minimum. I begin training for my job on the first of May, and I won't start being paid until the middle of May. So, it's just a little longer before we start moving ahead, I tell him. I wish he could relax.

Considering my passion for blogging, writing, and researching online, I have been looking into "Monetizing" some blogs with Google AdSense. I have read that some people are able to fund large portions of their business with AdSense. I was hoping it could be a decent subsidy to our income, etc. I don't know. I'm so wary of doing anything that has to do with money online. Anyone else heard anything about it?

On a positive note, Will and I are making very large, albeit difficult strides in our efforts to communicate effectively. Tonight, L, Will and I are all going for a walk to the Point (that overlooks the fjord).

We'll bring a camera so you can come, too.
I hope Will and I can leave most if not all of our problems there, and return refreshed.

oh...refreshment I crave.

Let's Start Over From Here...

2009-04-22T15:04:00.002-08:00

Last night, I told Will that I wished I could marry him all over again. I have a strong desire to renew what promises we made to each other...freshen up our commitment...remember love that may have been forgotten.

I'm not quite sure how to express that, and I'm not quite sure how he feels about our relationship...maybe there's something we can do...I don't know. I just wish I had more pictures like this that capture a happiness that won't go away.

Crazy in the Car

2009-04-19T11:49:00.002-08:00

Stuck in Billings...and goin' wacky.

Dimentia in Traffic

2009-04-18T11:37:00.002-08:00

What happens when you've been in the car a little too long...

I found the Camera! (more adventures from the road)

2009-04-18T10:46:00.004-08:00

I was pretty scared when I found this random video on the camera. (You see, I was very protective of the camera while we were traveling and I freaked out when I lost the camera...I knew I might find it later, but...anyway...) Before we lost the camera, I found this weird short video on it. I thought for a minute, "What if someone took it on a hike with them or something...or...what is that?" I started to get very worried.

Finally I showed it to Will, and asked him what he thought it was. He laughed at me and told me to figure it out myself.

Well, eventually I did:

I felt pretty silly.

Pictures of Part of the Journey...(before I lost the camera)

2009-04-06T11:55:00.004-08:00

And aparently Blogger has decided to load them in reverse order, so here we go!

This is us at the first Hotel in Billings, MT. A very unfortunate-looking town in an April snowstorm, but very fun when staying at a hotel with an awesome waterpark.

Somewhere in Montana

Somewhere in Wyoming

At Laural's house before we left...

I will attempt to load some fun videos of us in the car and us swimming.
:)

Valentine's Day--The Best One Yet!

2009-02-24T08:41:00.002-09:00

My "Photo Booth" Pictures

2009-02-24T08:30:00.002-09:00

My nose was sore from a cold...I was hoping my clevage would distract from my case of the sniffles.

Valentine's Day "Photo Booth" Pictures

2009-02-24T07:11:00.003-09:00

PS...this was the funnest V-Day yet. Will and I had a great time.

Status

2009-02-13T09:01:00.005-09:00

We're fat, we're bored, and we're really tired of working for other people and companies. I have been reading the Rich Dad Poor Dad series, and Will has been working to turn his appartment-owning pipe dreams into reality.

There has to be a better way to live than the way we have been living up until now. Whatever that way is, we're headed for it.

Will has been especially sensitive lately because of his disgust with his status in life. The bright side to this disgust is that it has been fueling his drive to achieve success in business. Simply put, he's putting his action where his mouth is.

I have been discovering what it means to support my husband. Besides leaving him alone when he's working, I have found that working to keep myself healthy, happy and pretty does wonders for by husband's morale. I finally have internalized the fact that most good men feel responsible for the health, happiness and other care of their women and families...if I'm a wreck, that's just one more boulder on his mountain of worry, and unfortunately for his dreams, I come first. It has proved to help him considerably for me to take care of myself...or at least keep my problems off his plate. It helps him if I have a life and enjoy myself.

And enjoy myself, I am striving to do...which is not particularly easy on a cloudy Friday afternoon.

Mornings Getting Better

2009-01-22T08:26:00.003-09:00

Will gets really cranky in the mornings. Many of our fights have been in the morning, and have been provoked by me trying to connect with him before he is fully awake. He's definitely a bear, and definitely not himself until he's fully awake.

Bless Will's heart, this has not stopped him from trying to be more kind to me in the mornings. The past few mornings especially, Will has been sweet and at times, playful. Just when I think I'll have to live with his quirks forever, he morphs yet again.

Just one more reason he's wonderful.

Death/ "Lady Death"

2009-01-15T09:32:00.002-09:00

"Lady Death"

"Death" Herself

...te,he,he...we had so much fun with that photo shoot.

:)

Alaska: 9 weeks away

2009-01-15T09:04:00.003-09:00

Alaska, here we come.

This year, we're taking the car...and a friend: (whom I have dubbed "Lady Death"--not for morbid demeanor, but because she can look very much like the character from Sandman with the right makeup and lighting...lol.)

Lady Death, Will and I are all very excited. Will has plotted several routes through CO, thru Edmenton, through WA...who knows how things will end up. But I am looking forward to the drive. I would rather avoid the jet lag and exposure to germs and radiation that come with flying. And have you checked ticket prices and fees these days? Ugh! Why not take the time to see the landscape, sit in a very comfy chair and sleep on a real bed at night? It will be a little pricy, but if one takes into account how much we spent renting a car last summer for drives to Wal-Mart in Canada, in the end it really will be worth it.

Relationship-wise, Will and I have had a few scarry hours, but I've been too sensitive lately, and Will has been testy. We got over it quickly. Financially, we are doing very well. Both of us have been tracking our bank accounts for the past few weeks, and we have been more aware of our spending. We still can't seem to give up eating out, but at least we have not gone in the hole to do it.

Things are really good...more fun to come!

Christmas, Moving Stuff, and the Sabbath

2008-12-29T07:10:00.008-09:00

Christmas was great. Will and I were able to capture more magic, nostalgia and love than we did last year with all of our big purchases and running around. This year, our finances are so stressed that we had little more to offer those we loved than our presence and smiles. Turns out, that's all they really want anyway.

Tonight, we will spend part of our date night settling our minds and eliminating a bill: the storage unit.

We'll get a truck and clear the place out tonight, moving it all to the barn at the K family place. It will be so helpful to have an extra $90 every month. Will and I have becime even more careful with our money as of late, and I have plugged back into the finances with as basic of technology as I can: a notebook and a pencil. That's right, I'm down to basic math...addition and subtraction...and I'm determined NOT to lapse this time.

This was the first weekend in a long time that I did not have to work or have the threat of working retail. It's not the work or the retail that bothered me. I discovered this weekend as I had my entire Sunday free to spend in worship and with family how refreshing the Sabbath day is for me, and how essential.

Will had a few spiritual impressions this weekend about his choice of career and his potential family with me. When he mentioned it to me, I finally felt good and certain about our current direction. Alaska, school in Nebraska...and kids somewhere in there, whenever we are graced with their presence. It's all solid in my being, finally.

And in general, I wanted to let all our friends and family know how much we appreciate your patience, comfort, support and love over the past year. Things have been very rough for us, and had it not been for our web of support, we may have thrown in the towel. To the degree that things were bad this past year and a half, things have been very good for the past few months, and it's getting better.

Thank you all, and may the goodwill given return to you multiplied this year.

LOVE,

Will and Krista (LINK)

Finally Ready for Christmas!

2008-12-16T09:29:00.002-09:00

It's SNOWING! (picture taken this morning)

Krista's stocking, Will's stocking.

The beginning of Will's little town...aw...

And this is our tree! Didn't my sweetie do a great job?

Snowflakes

2008-12-16T06:38:00.002-09:00

Bellydance Tree

2008-12-16T05:59:00.003-09:00

Will doesn't like having pictures or videos taken of him. I tell him it's an insult to posterity...he started scolding me, but managed to loosen up enough to finish dressing the tree...

in my costume.

Family Home Evening Last Week

2008-12-16T05:01:00.002-09:00

Snowflakes!

Friend L (because I haven't determined a good nickname yet) joined us for a very rushed night of decorating the tree and cutting snowflakes. She has been converted to Skagway, and will be joining us this summer...possibly riding up with us in our car if we decide to drive. Honestly, I am looking forward to that.

Will's reindeer snowflake...I asked Will if he actually knew how to make snowflakes. He said yes, but most of them turned out like this...

lol

The Anniversary of our First Date...almost.

2008-12-12T08:18:00.002-09:00

Well, it's that time of year again...

the anniversary of our first date, which never happened because Will was busy decorating his parent's house for Christmas and totally forgot that he had asked me out. To this day, I still wonder why he didn't invite me over to help him? (lol) "Wow," I remember saying over the phone. "You must REALLY love Christmas!"

It has been about 5 years since then, and I have been married to this Christmas Elf for a little over 1 of those years. Since then (and just last night) I have discovered that there's no stopping Will once he's wrapped up in a project. Kissing, flirting, playfully pestering and otherwise distracting this man once he has harnessed his focus generally brings wrath.

Gladly the outcome of last night's discussion (and it really was a discussion--not yelling or crying) was that we could both stand to loosen up. I can just let Will go and do what he has to do when he's focussed, and Will can recieve my pestering and flirting as it was meant to be: displays of affection.

I wish the pictured Christmas Tree was ours. The next post will include a few pictures (and hopefully a couple videos if Blogger will let me load it) of us decorating our roommate's huge tree. So far, the trimmings include a recently gifted liteup snowman head, cutout stars and snowflakes, zills, and my bellydancing bra. In between work and other necessary evils, a friend, Will and I were able to scrounge together one hour to do this on Monday.

Some things in life are necessary: gas for the car, food, 100% cotton tampons, and putting up the Christmas tree...apparently, dating me ranked below this one a few years ago. At least now he couldn't imagine Christmas without me...I couldn't imagine it without him either.

The Music Man, in alto tone

2008-11-29T10:00:00.004-09:00

A couple weeks ago, we went to the suburbs of KC to watch a junior production of The Music Man. A friend's daughter had landed the lead role (Marian). I myself played "Ulele McKeknie Shinn, the mayor's wife" in high school my senior year. I had so much fun doing the show, I was very excited to see her do it.

Here's Will smiling begrudgingly for me. (He's so sweet!)

Going back to this middle school was a huge flashback for me. I went to one of the "other" junior highs in the area, and it was built precisely the same. Oh, the memories...where I ate lunch, where me and Brian did that one skit everybody loved so much...the days when Ian's first band performed for the first time when Mark was still alive...

Good times.

The production was pretty put together. Understandably, I'm biased, but I have to say my young friend nailed Marian. She had the right amount of coldness and eventual emotional thaw. If only her singing voice were present for the performance. For the first time ever in my life, I heard the part of Marian sung entirely in alto. She pulled through the panic and did a terrific job.

Way to use the "think system," Marian! We're proud of you!

She's Back!

2008-11-11T07:22:00.002-09:00

Roof-SIL (Will's nickname for her is "Roof") is back from basic training for the Air National Guard. She loves the military. Never before have I seen Roof so mellow and easy. Her choice of career seems to have triggered inside her a sense of balance and prudence. It makes me very happy to see her so happy.

Jack-BIL is in the Army National Guard and this Sunday at their father's birthday party, Roof and Jack had a contest to see who could march better. We've decided this should be a contest performed for Grandpa K. Jack -BIL gave a great impression of Grandpa K telling them how it was done in the old days...and went on about how they had to get up and march at 4AM...it was very funny.

Will's family is looking forward to Thanksgiving. Most likely, this will be the last time all the kids are together for a very long time. Beckham-BIL and Cassanova-BIL (the twins) are graduating from high school this year, and will soon after serve as missionaries for two years. MetroPink will welcome their first girl in the spring, Jack and Jill are moving to Utah, and Will and I are planning on going to K-State or Nebraska for school in a year. We're all finally moving on, and the momentum of our lives will make it more difficult for the whole K-Clan to come together at the holidays. We certainly will relish the experiences we have in the up-coming weeks.

Feeling like a Statistic

2008-11-08T09:53:00.002-09:00

The past few days, Will and I have worried about how the economy is affecting our futures. Not just our debt, which is substantial like so many of the middle/lower class, but how all of this is going to affect our ability to go to school, get better jobs and actually build a good life for ourselves.

Gee, we really are grown-ups now, huh.

lol

We are, of course, wishing we had made better financial decisions, wishing there was some way we could get just a little ahead...trying to figure out how to pay off our debt, how to get the most money we can for school, and how to find the time to go to school when we still have to work to pay off all this debt! It's a huge, vicious cycle, and at times it's very discouraging. We're hoping the new presidential administration will work out something in our favor.

Will is still trying to decide wether or not to go to Alaska in the spring. The position at the apartment complex has fizzled out, and he started at that temp job at the call center. We are really low on money, and it's been very difficult at times not to point fingers and say "I told you we shouldn't have done such and such!" But I am happy to report that we have sucessfully resisted the temptation, altho we have failed to resist the comfort junk-food. No one's perfect, right?

In spite of our struggles, our communication has blossomed, and we are very content with each other. In time, I know our finances will work out and that eventually, we will enjoy complete prosperity. Hope is still with us.

A Steady Diet of Donuts and Chocolate Milk

2008-11-04T10:32:00.003-09:00

Will has been moping for the past couple weeks.

He did the rounds of temp agencies when he got home, and was offered a job at a call center giving tech support to retail stores. This job actually has an end...but ends exactly in time for us to go back up to AK.

In the meantime, he found an opening in the office at the apartments where we used to live. He gave a great interview, and the manager said she really wanted to hire him...but it was ultimately up to her boss...who didn't even live in our town. If he were to take this job, he would quit the job in AK, and stay down here in KS. He was actually starting to really like this idea, and really had his heart set on staying here.

He waited a whole week for his phone interview with the out-of-town boss, and nothing happened. Finally on Halloween, he talked to the manager to ask about the delay. Apparently, the boss had hired someone else without interviewing Will, and without calling even to let him know he had been trumped. But the manager said that this person was not returning her phone calls, so maybe Will still had a chance.

No phone calls since last Friday--my husband is pouty. He has been eating a steady diet of donuts and chocolate milk. Right now, he's obsessively cleaning the house. My poor sweetie. Will has agreed to the temp job for now, and we have been re-gearing our thoughts for Alaska.

I think Will is finally seeing that the two of us have much more in common than he thought. We both grow weary in the middle of our plans, and long for a new exciting path, instead of seeing our plans through to the end that we really want in the first place. Is there really anyone who cheerfully puts up with extended periods of work, waiting and struggle? Maybe, but while they're all hanging out in heaven, Will and I are down here...and eventually we'll get it.

We Voted!

2008-11-04T09:00:00.003-09:00

Will's Sticker.

Me and my voting stuff.

Will eating a bananna.

We walked to our voting station, which was the nursing home just next to our apartments. They gave us muffins. Hope you all voted.

Bit and Her Dress, Halloween 2008

2008-11-04T08:20:00.003-09:00

I wanted to get her to walk around in her dress, but I ran out of memory on the camera.

Will and I worked all night on the 31st, then went to Jack and Jill's for some candy corn and evening-old velveeta.

Good Times.

Happy Halloween!

"Oh, shoot!" Halloween with Bit-SIL

2008-11-01T13:06:00.003-08:00

Will tried to take a picture of Bit-SIL (I have dubbed my youngest sister-in-law "Bit")
It didn't take him long to realize he had it on the wrong setting...priceless!

This time, he succeeded. Brother and sister--aran't they adorable?

At Last!

2008-10-16T14:05:00.002-08:00

My love is back! So sorry it took so long to give you a travelogue, but, um, we've been a little busy. (tee-hee!) :)

I got lost on my way to the airport, but arrived and parked just in time for him to call me. The first thing he did was kiss me, then we grabbed his luggage and went off to find the Cheesecake Factory, which we never found (missed the exit, I guess.) Having spent so much time looking for that restaurant...we had to settle for whatever was open: IHOP. That night at the hotel was very nice.

The next day, we were able to find the Cheesecake Factory on the plaza, and wasn't it a sight to behold:

I never thought it would be that pretty!

We went out to dinner with friends that night, and then finally came home. Over the next few days, we bought another filing cabinet and a huge piece of wood so that Will could have a huge desk to work at. (I'm starting to realize that Office Supplies are to Will what yarn is to me--there's just never enough, and there's always a reason to get more.)

(Will setting things up...and our humble little room.)

A notable, palatable peace covered us this past week--and oh, how we needed it! The worries of life seem to be pulling on us again, but we are behaving differently toward each other, and it is aparent that we are trying. It's working.

I pray that peace that has been with us will come again, and eventually come to stay.

On His Way!

2008-10-08T16:13:00.002-08:00

I cannot wait to see my Sweetie!

He's on the ferry right now, floating toward Juneau.

I'm so tired of being apart from him, and so ready to have some fun! His company in AK had a good ending month, so they decided to tack on even more to his end of the year bonus.

:) we could not be happier.

He already has an interview on Monday for a do-dah job that pays pretty well. And he has some other leads he will be following up on. I'm glad he had stuff to do. Will bored is not very good. It will be nice to have someone there to keep me in check. Me left to myself has never really proven to be a good thing. Two months, and I confess, my suitcase is still on the floor holding up piles of my clothes.

I have thought to do this and that for him when he comes home, but finally, when I asked him what he thought would be fun, he couldn't decide. So he's letting me decide what we get to do! This is a big deal, because Will has a tendency to take over planning no matter whose idea it was...lol...funny, but not funny when you are trying to surprise someone that shares your bank account! lol

Well, I told him to come home to me safely to me, and to call me often tomorrow inbetween all those layovers.

My Sweetie is coming home!

29 going on 13

2008-10-01T09:44:00.003-08:00

My heart is very tender right now.

I was so embarassed to tell Will again this morning that I...I simply missed him. It's to the point where sometimes, I just want to cry because he isn't with me--no extra baggage. We havn't disagreed or argued in weeks. And Will has been so good about saying things to make me feel better. (whereas before he had a hard time thinking of things to say) Today, after listening to me bashfully admit that once again this morning I just missed him, and felt so juvenile for admitting that was the only cause of my upset feelings...

He said with a smile in his voice, "Krista, you're so adorable."

I had never been called that before! Not even by my parents when I was young. Will said that my fussing made him feel special. He admitted that he has had trouble sleeping for the past couple weeks...and he attributes it to missing me.

My tears recently have been sweeter, tho sad. There is a clean feeling in lamenting over something so innocent and temporary. He will be home in a little over eight days. Not long at all. I feel like we are getting married again...that agonizing separation night after night before we were finally able to consumate our love. I feel like I get to try all of this over again, but with a better perspective. Will is bringing a whole new bunch of skills and understanding to the party as well. As horrible as our separation has been, we have turned it for good, and I am so glad we made it.

Will and I have a date tonight to talk about stuff that has nothing to do with us--life, art, anything. It's the little things that are keeping me afloat right now...

(he called me adorable!)

thank you to some friends: O and A

2008-09-17T07:53:00.002-08:00

(to those married)

When was the last time you thought of your relationship and how it was before you were married? Relationships can get so complicated, especially because people are so complicated...but can you remember what it was like when you were falling in love? How you treated your spouse when they were just a friend? Before you even hooked up?

I have been thinking about that last night and today. I remember the way Will and I were when we were just friends. I remember how cute and pathetic I thought he was...and how much instant trust he invested in me on the very first conversation as if we had been investing this trust with each other all our lives.

I am not now the woman I was then, and I frankly long to have her back. I wonder if Will misses that woman? Well, whatever he may miss, I know that one thing has never been absent within him, and that is his love for me.

I don't know if time heals all wounds--I'm never patient enough to find out. But I trust that everything I learn is bringing me just a little closer to really "getting it."

Will and I are excited to see each other in three weeks. The time has gone by quickly, and I am glad.

By the way, it's Will's birthday on the 24th! If you know Will, you ought to give him a call. I wish I knew how to surprise him! Any suggestions?

Retrospective Vision

2008-09-05T10:26:00.001-08:00

Yesterday I found a silver ring that had this phrase engraved on it:

“Love is patient, Love is kind”

My super retrospective vision is showing me to myself in 3-D Technicolor. I should have been slow to criticize and quick to praise. Let my desire to lavish my husband with laud fly freely off my tongue before I consider whether or not he deserves it. But with my censure, let me be so guarded and let me consider my words so carefully that if I must bring it to his attention, he may feel hardly a sting. Let me forget festering feelings that will not matter in a year. Let me expect that my husband can and will grow to be a better man. That he wishes to become someone that pleases me. I can have faith that just as I seek to do good to him, he seeks to do good to me.

I can be less afraid. I can let my parent’s problems be their problems, and not expect that their fates will be mine. I can do as my brother told me—expect that when he conveys a sentiment, he means exactly what he has said, and I do not need to second guess his words or his love.

I imagine it will take quite some time for the grime of our conflicts to wear off, but I have faith that it will. And eventually, maybe soon, we can laugh with each other again…and maybe be in love like we never have been before.

True Love is patient and kind.

Alaska, yet again.

2008-09-04T13:37:00.002-08:00

We decided it would be good for us to go back to Skagway next summer.

Will's boss did the happy dance when he told her. They made a pretty good offer to lure him back--this time he has some more substantial expenses paid and a very nice salary. Will wants this to be his last year woring in AK for a 6month stretch. He told me he intends to go back to school in the spring of 2010.

We have a really good handle on our spending right now, and with the generous bonus management gave him, we will be able to totally pay off the debt on our list with the highest interest rate!

WAHOO! Can you smell the burning plastic? :)

Our interpersonal communication is gradually getting better. Will and I still have a lot to work on, but for the time being we are stable, and still trying our best to be loving and move forward. I think we're both just literally tired of fighting. I know I am. We haven't really had fun together in a long while, and the separation is really wearing on us. I have come to the ppoint where I'm counting the days until I see him again.

It hurts that we are still a month apart, but soon enough we'll be together again and the clouds will lift.

Progress!

2008-08-20T08:58:00.002-08:00

Not exactly in the direction I wanted, but at least SOMETHING has been decided. Yet again I have been denied a loan for school. After discussing the matter for five minutes, it was easy for Will and I to see that neither of us will be able to move our lives ahead until our debt is taken care of. So, we decided to spend the next year working off all of the debt.

Really, I am grateful. I have been yearning for us to develop a common vision and goal since we got married. Not that I recommend self-imposed hardship for unifying people--by all means, use us as an example--STAY OUT OF DEBT--but I think this will really help us.

The relief is palatable. Within me and between us. I was having a horrible time reconciling my desire to get out of debt with my desire to go to school. I am thankful that fate made the decision for me. I am actually looking forward to what the next year will bring.

It's All Good...

2008-08-15T12:26:00.003-08:00

Well, everything seems okay. Will has been given the green light to work as much as he would like at work. This is good: overtime. And I suppose this will help the next 7 weeks go by sooner.

I have an interview on Monday for a part time job, and I anticipate more interviews soon, but I may not get called until next week, considering that today is Friday, and Human Resouces everywhere have little desire to do anything until Monday.

I had a small realization last night while talking to Will--I'm starting to understand him more and more. My husband and I are two people of very distinct personalities and talents. We have unique ways of processing life and different languages with which we communicate. I assumed all this would be the case, but I thought the languages would be more like German to English rather than Swahili to Cantoneese. Nevertheless, here and there, I "get it." Last night, something clicked, and I understood something he has been trying to tell me for months...

It's all good.
Everything is fine,
and everything that is not fine,
is going to be fine.
"We" are okay.

and
We are going to make it.

Parted

2008-08-13T10:20:00.002-08:00

(pictures to come--I'm on a friend's computer)

At the end of a week-long flu, I realized I just couldn't take it anymore. (Hindsight tells me that I was most likely suffering from SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) ...and so is Will, for all I know. Three seasons of cold, rain and little sunlight could definitely do that to a person.) I quit my job upon returning to work after being sick, and immediately started preparing to leave.

A week and two days later, here I am--in Kansas again. I can't tell you how good I feel. I'm distributing applications and making last preparations to return to school (the financial aid is pending). I have been so busy and feeling good that I haven't really had a chance to miss Will at all. I wish that he would write on this blog and share some of his experiences. But I think he's like many other husbands...he just works and eats and sleeps, and lets the wife do her "blog thing" for the family.

This is the first time we have been away from each other since we've been married. If he stays for the rest of the season like he was planning, then we will be apart for two months. I was okay until the ferry started floating away from the shore. Then came the tears. We stayed on the cell phone until we couldn't see each other anymore. At that point, Will's voice began to break...or maybe it was the cell phone cutting off...

...later he told me that he bought donuts and chocolate milk and stayed at home the rest of the day.

I hope he reads the blogs while we're apart.

Will, if you're reading this, I love you.

Expecting...a miracle.

2008-07-30T12:09:00.004-08:00

A couple we know are expecting their first child in about a month. My sisters and I were looking at professional pictures they had taken with mom, dad, and the pregnant belly. One of the shots was of the two of them with their hands on the belly in the shape of a heart. Since Will and I aren't pregnant yet, we used the next best body part we could find...

Aw...

We've been talking a lot lately about what course of action would truly make me happy. I still think it's unfair that much of the focus should be on my happiness and not ours, but if there is one thing I have learned in the past couple weeks, it is that nothing should be done to force someone to face issues they're not ready to face. This can't turn into me confronting Will again. I finally figured out Will doesn't work that way. He has to have time to think things through. Still, how do we make decisions NOW toward individual happiness and have it work toward the happiness of us both?

I am practicing taking my husband at his word. That is, allowing him to make decisions about his future and gauge the execution of those decisions as he sees fit. Trust is a big thing for Will...I think when he says "trust" he also means "have faith in me--don't hate me if I slip back a couple times." I think I can do that. It will be difficult for me, but I can't refuse him--he's so cute when he's vulnerable. :)

As of last night, I think we finally understand each other. I will not stop being restless until I do something to forward my life and Will can't move on with his life until he pays off the credit cards. So I'm going home in a couple weeks to set up our house, secure my jobs and start school. Will is going to finish out the season and just work as much as he can until next fall, hoping to be clear of debt by then so that he can return to school.

The funny thing is, all the stress and conflict has beat upon us like a spiked mallet--it hurt, but we're thoroughly tenderized. (lol) We are so sweet to each other, and surrender to the other to soothe the wounds we have inflicted on each other. One would think that we have weakened, but we have not.

Skagway, Alaska certainly hasn't been the stroll in the mountains we expected, but we sure have learned a lot. We have so much work ahead of us, but at least we're pulling the load together.

"Dang Quesedilla"

2008-07-25T17:59:00.004-08:00

The other night, Will made himself a quesedilla for dinner with my sister's leftover hamburger. (we seem to have quesedillas every night recently--I'm hoping to break that trend) I asked if I could have some (the quesedilla was, after all, the size of a medium pizza.)

He said "no" then "yes."

Figuring he was being a dork, I took a little over 1/4 of the cheezy patty.

"Is that how much you're taking?!" he blurted out, with a tone not meant to be kidding at all.

Tired of him, I threw up my hands and said I would make my own dang quesedilla.

A few moments later, he came over to me and put his arms around me. "I'm sorry. I'm just not happy with myself right now, and I'm taking it out on you."

I couldn't help but smile as he explained.

"I'm almost 30, and I have no degree and no house," (we had been talking in general about buying a house) "I'm upset that I'm so far behind other people my age."

I laughed and kissed him. Forgiven. Little did I know it would get even more ugly later on that night.

He was suggesting all kinds of things that I thought were unrealistic to do...and insisting that he could do all of them now...start a business, get a house AND go to school. I disagreed with all of these things thinking, has he lost his mind?

Finally, he made some curt remark to kill the conversation in the middle of my sentence. I told him how rude he was, and he didn't seem sorry. The next morning he apologized for the rudeness, but he was still brewing all day.

This time around, I didn't feel the urge to blame myself for our lack of communication. Instead, a thought came to my mind:

...maybe it's like the dang quesedilla...

and I recalled those brave blog entries that declared I wanted to help Will as he has helped me this past year. He put up with my irrational, emotional outbursts. Shouldn't I return the favor?

Change of Plans...

2008-07-23T07:24:00.003-08:00

Will and I did more "discussing" about a week ago. I think we're making progress in spite of how frightening it still is sometimes. Anyway, one discussion led to making up led to other discussions and finally some prayer and fasting.

We've decided to switch up our school plans. Unfortunately, our semi-valiant efforts to pay off debt have left us with a large amount to go...and Will has a hard time stomaching the thought of going to school with significant debt. I have a hard time stomaching the thought of Will avoiding school just because of money.

I can go to massage school later.
And I realized that if we want children in our life it would be best to leave some sort of space for them. Over the years, when I have been honest with myself, the one thing I have wanted to do most with my life is be a wife and a mom. I could be anything I want...it's ironic that we can't seem to obtain the other part of that equation.

In spite of our frustrations in the baby department, Will and I are content with figuring each other out. Once we finally get home in late October, we will be looking into some counseling or ....some communications coaching .....or something......to help us understand ourselves and each other better.

Right now, there's a lot of love and peace between us. We're more in love than we were a year ago. It's hard sometimes to be thankful for the struggles in life, but if it brings us closer, I guess I can't help but bless it.

Courtesy of Jill-SIL...

2008-07-11T21:21:00.000-08:00

It's Buisiness Time...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WGOohBytKTU

LOL...

One Man's Frustration is Another Woman's Opportunity...

2008-07-08T12:26:00.007-08:00

The business Will works for has been very good to him. I am learning so much about Will and the way he works. Will takes pride in being a hard worker and going beyond what he's asked to do in order to bring excellence to the companies he works for. As his Wife, I never really understood this work ethic until recently. Will worked overtime day after day last week just to get their computer system up and running. At the end of the week, his boss gave him a three-day weekend. It was great to have him home, and wonderful to know he was unwinding and resting. Will was blessed to have great people to work with.

Unfortunately for the company, they recently had an importaint person cease employment Hollywood style (with drama and controversy). Fortunately for Will, this may mean a promotion! They're talking about it right now, but things are looking good for my sweetie...and a promotion couldn't come at a better time than now:

I quit my job this morning.

I probably should have done it last month, but I wanted to be absolutely sure it was the right thing to do. We prayed about it, and I actually did a lot of meditation about my feelings and what I was experiencing with my employer. His refusal to accept the week's notice I offered summerized all the reasons I decided to leave and helped me not to regret it so much.

My meditation helped me to understand that when the time was right, I would have another opportunity open up and I could fall safely into a different place where things will be better. As it so-happened, this morning that very thing happened! Yesterday, Will and I made the decision to go through with finding me another job. His supervisors happened to need an office assistant and I happened to be completely qualified. I interviewed this morning before work, got kicked out of work and had a new job by mid-morning.

Will's reputation as a hard and honest worker has given us good references both for this apartment that we enjoy, and now for the new job I needed. Life is so much more than money, and one's reputation and good heart are so much more precious than "getting ahead." Integrity may be a turtle, but if I recall correctly, the rabbit didn't win that one...

Work, Work, Work

2008-07-01T07:26:00.002-08:00

Clarification: Will never lost his full-time job. He is still assistant manager for the giftshop of a tourist attraction. Altho with the hours he's been putting in lately, he may as well be the manager. ::sigh:: Will and his work ethic. I don't really mind how many days he works 6AM-12AM, but it's the fact that when he does come home, he sleeps. It's difficult to be around a person who is half-zombie. Especially when one requires a little kissing.

I am currently experiencing burnout. I've decided that retail was never for me, and is not still. A manager's shop practically becomes part of their body, and I am happy Will does not desire to be in retail for the rest of our lives. I married a man, not a store.

The other day, we had the second misunderstanding of June...this one really got us somewhere. Will finally expressed his feelings! He said the first year of our marriage was lopsided--that he tended to my needs and got little of his own needs met. This is something I have been trying to get Will to admit for a long time. Now, he's starting to understand that I have always been willing to meet his needs too--I just need help understanding what they are. I need him to tell me!

Things are getting better between us. Little by little, we're really getting better.

All the stuff that happened once we moved into the trailer...

2008-06-27T08:29:00.003-08:00

The trailer we lived in was the size of a bathroom. Imagine placing a stove, oven, cabinets, refrigerator, couch, table, closet and a queen size sleeping space all into your bathroom. We had a walking space two feet wide and three feet long. Once we fit all of our clothes, food and other necessities in there and added our own bodies...no one should have to live like that. We tried to smile and appreciate where we were living, but there was a strong underscore of depressing and oppressive circumstance that was not conducive to mental health.

Unfortunately, my boss and I had a great deal of trouble communicating and the first two weeks were very rocky at work for me. At first, Will was also helping with inventory. Then there was more miscommunication amongst him and the other inventory guy and my boss. As the month came to a close, there were all kinds of yucky feelings flying around at my workplace and the place where we lived was only available out of the good graces of my boss. This placed us in a very difficult position. We started praying periodically to try and find a solution. Things seemed to get a little worse.

My boss is actually a very nice man, but he did eventually feel the need to "let Will go"...(which was more of a relief for Will)...and just happened to do so on our anniversary. It didn't bother Will very badly, but it sure was funny timing.

That night in our emotionally exhausted state, after we ate pizza, we walked toward the point. We had just spent the last month arguing and enduring contention at work. We needed a respite like you wouldn't believe. We happened to pass by a huge house that seemed to be completely unoccupied on the bottom half (and it was a HUGE bottom half). Will paused, and wondered aloud if someone might rent it to us. I said probably not. If they were they would advertise. So Will and I took several more steps, Will paused again and decided he would just knock on the door and ask. There was no harm in asking!

That was the night we made a commitment to pray together and read the scriptures every night (at my request). Since that night, we have only missed a few days (due to long hours at Will's work) and many things we prayed for have come to us in spades:

-We live in a three bedroom two full bath apartment that is a 5 minute walk from my work
-we finally have access to the Internet so that we can manage our finances and keep in touch with all of you
-My boss and I not only understand one another, we actually like each other
-I have found personal peace, and I am beginning to actually move forward in my efforts to be healthy
-Will and I are really understanding each other, and have only fought once this month

Seeing all these blessings coordinate with prayer has encouraged us to have faith that we may ask for other deep desires and perhaps receive those too.

So now, I'm working on me, Will is just working, and we are both working on our relationship and trying to start a family.

That's all you missed.
Sorry it took me so long.
:)

Whitehorse, Eh? (Anniversary--the Conclusion)

2008-06-22T17:15:00.003-08:00

All day long, our sentences ended with "eh?" and we shamelessly giggled every time.

We found a sushi restaurant. I have always wanted to eat sushi at a restaurant on a coast...I just always thought my first time would be in California. This place was excellent! And yes, the sushi was very fresh.

We ordered the "Lunchbox." It was really a box:

Will had to try this donut place that his Canadian mission companions raved about. We weren't impressed. I ordered a donut called "The Dutchie." Apparently, it's a square donut with golden raisins and cinnamon. Not too bad. I also discovered that milk in Canada tastes much different--made me wonder what milk really tatses like.

We ran errands for our friends. Then, we took a walk through Wal-Mart. I found a line of bathing suits named after me--with the correct spelling! We tried to find a couple of cool Canada flag shirts, but we could only find dorky Canada shirts. So we bought those. Will bought a bright red hat with white lettering: "C A N A D A"

Then we saw "Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull" (and took pictures of each other in the dark.) We loved that movie. We had so much fun.

A local Christian rock band was playing across the street from the movie theatre. We were invited to stay and have free hamburgers (seemed like the equivalent of an LDS activity) but we decided to window shop a little more.

We found a hotel lounge and had a light dinner. The evening was getting late (but no less bright). We would have gone home at that point, but all the gas stations were closed. We had to get a huge hotel room with a kingsize bed. No little bathroom-size camper for a whole night.

Oh, darn.

:)
Great anniversary, eh?

The Yukon (Anniversary, Part Three)

2008-06-22T16:24:00.003-08:00

The nearest Wal-Mart is two hours north in Whitehorse, Yukon, Canada. We had to make a u-turn at US Customs--I had forgotten my ID. Will was mad at me for about 5 minutes. I tried to convince him it was funny. He eventually stopped being mad, but I don't think he ever found it funny. :)

The scenery was absolutely unbelievably alien and beautiful. The pictures we took do it no justice whatsoever. A picture of a cardboard box would be prettier than the ones we took.

The highway led us through land of slow-rising slopes, peaks covered in snow, lakes of snowmelt reflecting the easy sunlight,and trees that I had never seen before. No power lines. No houses. No highway exits. No stores. No civilization at all. I forgot Will was in the car. I forgot how I got there. We forgot the conversation. We forgot to take pictures. For two hours we were on a different planet.

At Carcross (halfway there) we stopped for a potty break. When we were ready to drive again, the car wouldn't start. Will found a thin woman with short hair and a distict Canadian "eh?" who knew something about car batteries. Somehow, they cleaned the battery connection and got the car to start. Finally, the land again became marred with power lines and the exit for Whitehorse emerged...

Thursday (Anniversary, Day Two)

2008-06-22T15:34:00.005-08:00

We had pizza--again. This time we invited Kezia. Partly to help us eat the pizza, but mostly to take pictures I couldn't.

Last year we decided to make it a tradition to have a small version of our wedding cake made and eat it every year. Unfortunately, this year we were not near the bakery that made our cake. So we asked one of the local bakeries to make us a strawberry swirl cake with butter-cream frosting. Since their quirky specialty is enormous cupcakes, that's what we got. (which is kinda cool, because originally I wanted a tower of cupcakes for our wedding) The guy in the kitchen of the restaurant took our cake and "presented" it to us after pizza. So nice of him!

This time we used forks.

Happy anniversary, sweetie.

The best was yet to come that Saturday...

June 2, 2008--One Year!!! (Day One)

2008-06-22T14:05:00.004-08:00

I won't lie: in the past two months Will and I have fought more than we have the whole time we have been married. The strange thing is, we hated fighting the whole time we were fighting, but we couldn't stop fighting. Finally we identified that most of it was coming from jumping to conclusions and massive misunderstandings. From time to time, we would call truce, but we couldn't seem to make it last very long. It was as if we lived in the Trailer of Babel.

Continuing that trend, our anniversary was almost ruined by my stupid questions.

The night before, I asked whether or not he was attracted to me in high school and all the old girlfriends he loved before me. I cried because I wasn’t his favorite love…or something.

The next morning, I had to remind him of our anniversary and was a bit bothered by the previous night’s discussion. Later that morning, my sister and I had a discussion about what to ask and what NOT to ask one's husband.

I finally learned what I have not seen after the past two months of arguing: every day is new. That was then, this is now. Start fresh every day.

When I realized this, something inside of me clicked and everything was better. I not only let go of the issue in question, but I let go of all the other stupid stuff I knew he never meant to say. I forgot how horrible the past couple months were, and I existed in the moment: it was our first anniversary, and I was married to a good, handsome man who was crazy about me--hormones and all.

That day was a beginning--we've had only one misunderstanding since our anniversary. Three weeks is a record for us. Thank God for sisters!

On to the details:

Will remembered that I joked once: "If you ever decide to get me a rose, it better be a gold one." So he actually got me a 24K rose. You know--one of those preserved ones? In spite of how tacky it is, I'm sentimentally grafted to that thing. Good to know he listens and remembers. :)

After work and after pizza, we walked out to Yukatania Point. This short hike ends on enormous bolders and all you can see is ocean, mountains, forest and sky. If you're lucky, you can see wildlife. We saw a seal just past where Will is standing in this picture. I wish I could fit Alaska in my camera, but I just can't.

(Will stretching his back on the rocks)

Things Will Learned During May
-Be Thurough
-Camper Toilets Suck!
-God is still real.
-Krista is still real.
-Watch out for BEARS!

This was Day One of our anniversary celebration. Since we had to work, we celebrated over the course of a week. Our next little party was that Thursday...

The Season is Upon Us!

2008-04-25T11:01:00.003-08:00

In about a week, things will get very busy for both of us. "The Season" is starting. Which means that the boats will begin to dock in about a week and a half.

My boss should be arriving in about 3 days, which will start work for me and allow us to move into his camper. So we'll be moving and then promptly dealing with the tourist masses. Fun!

At Will's full time job, they're putting in new cash registers just before they open. He's also freaking out about how expensive everything is and when we have to pay things and whether or not we will be able to have the Internet or whether we'll have a stove and pots in the camper...

Me, I'm trying to pull out of vacation mode. I have SO enjoyed my month of no job...altho I have had to do stuff around the house like laundry and go to the post office and shop for groceries and stuff.

We enjoy walking everywhere, and are considering switching to a "walk everywhere" lifestyle. I for one would love it, and Will is beginning to love it too. Of course, we have gobs of nature and fresh air to enjoy--nothing like a city where it's miles between buildings and plenty of car emissions in between.

I guess we'll just enjoy what we can while we can.

Three planes and a boat later...

2008-04-10T14:47:00.000-08:00

The landscape visible from the windows of the ferry from Juneau to Skagway.

The docks at Skagway

The view from our bedroom windows

Stay tuned...and check out Krista's Blog as well!

Klondike Madness!

2008-04-10T14:17:00.001-08:00

For those of you who didn't get the memo (and I don't mean that sarcastically...I really mean this is for those I have not contacted--sorry!) I am blogging from Skagway, Alaska! We left on Saturday of last week, and arrived on Sunday. Whew! Here's some pictures and some explaination...

-The sunrise on our way out of Kansas-

In light of our mutual fed-up-ness with our respective jobs, Will and I decided to take summer jobs in Skagway, AK where my sister Keez has been working for the past two years.

-Krista, waiting for her nachos in Minneapolis Airport-

I decided it was time for me to get out of the rat race and really use my talents. It's massage school for me in the fall (most likely). Will is headed (probably) to KU while I am finishing massage school and national certification.

-A window next to the escilator in Seattle Airport-

After I have all my ceritfication done, Will wants to park in Omaha, NE where he can finish his architectural engineering degree. >sigh< I'm so tired of moving. But hey, we have to get on with life, and well, here we go...!

-See how Will's Skittles match the window? Taste the Window...er...Rainbow!-

MetroPink Wedding (winding down)

2008-04-10T13:38:00.001-08:00

Long story short, Will was all kinds of sick before we were able to leave temple square. Very, very ill.

Eventually, we got back to the house of our hosts. Will spent all of the next day in the bathroom. Then I got it, and I did the same thing. The horrible virus took me about a week to fully shake. I was trying not to throw up all over the plane on the way home. Ugh.

Before we exited stage left, I forced myself to take a picture of our beloved, kind, and highly accommodating hostess making us a delicious lime chicken that I wasn't able to eat for fear of puking...but oh, it smelled delicious!

And this is the main staircase...just to give you an idea of the opulence...we were in a very nice neighborhood.

All things considered, it was a wonderful trip...

...and made me very thankful that our wedding was little more than an elopement.

lol

Every now and then, it's lovely to be swept up in the fairy tale. Thanks Jack and Jill and MetroPink for making this such a memorable experience!

MetroPink Wedding Afterparty

2008-04-10T13:18:00.000-08:00

Brunch was great. It's a shame that my poor Tortuga was in the other room pale, tired, nauseated and...well, details on that later.

Metro had prepared a slideshow for everyone to watch. I got to know some of the people at the table. My favorite part was this game pictured below. It's an old German wedding tradition. The bride and groom sit like this, and each have one of the other's shoes. A member of the family reads from a list of day-to-day duties and the couple holds up the shoe of the person that will be doing the duty. It was really cute...and hilarious.

...and who will do the cooking?

...who will make sure the kitchen is clean?

...who will shop for the clothes?

LOL
It really was a great wedding, and a great trip.

MetroPink Wedding Pictures....

2008-04-10T12:54:00.000-08:00

Incidentally, temple Square was crawling with reporters that were covering President Hinkley's funeral. Many of the couples getting married that day were interviewed for the newspaper and local TV stations...including MetroPink. It was a great day.

MetroPink Wedding Pictures...

2008-04-10T12:32:00.000-08:00

MetroPink Wedding Pictures..

2008-04-10T12:16:00.000-08:00

MetroPink and their Photographer.

Some candids of Craig (sorry for the fuzziness--I had my point-and-shoot camera.)

I neglected to mention...Will began to feel ill as soon as he sat down in the sealing room. This is a picture of him on the phone with Jack-BIL trying to shake it off. Sorry to say, it didn't get better...

MetroPink Wedding Pictures.

2008-04-10T12:01:00.000-08:00

MetroPink Wedding Part Six

2008-04-10T10:09:00.001-08:00

The day of President Gordon B. Hinkley's funeral also happened to be the happiest day of their lives. Everyone was on time. The day was bright and brisk. I was regretting that I wore open-toed shoes.

If I had taken a picture if the look on Metro's face when he entered the sealing room with his bride, I would have committed sacrelige. Tho I attempt it here, nothing can describe the happiness and awe and fear and elation and love that overwhelmed the groom. He was wearing his wedding band already, and when his fingers were not busy with Pink's hands, they were turning the ring...perhaps attempting to bring a sense of reality to this heaven that had choked him to welling tears. I remembered so many conversations we had shared. I remembered the swollowed longing I had seen in him before when we talked of him finding someone to share forever with. I learned more of him in the moments of those tears than I had learned from any of his passion-infused ideas. Surely he understood in the tender cradle of his soul that she and her love trancended him.

I looked over at Pink--without tears, calm, seriously approaching her commitment. I saw myself in her...I silently and excitedly welcomed her to the club.

The officiator assured us that he would be brief. Quite a while later, after brevity passed and poured into oration, the ceremony was finally and eloquently pronounced.

I drank the sight of the groom's face, and I rejoyced.

A day of days.

The Bride and Groom as they exited the temple:

MetroPink Wedding Part Five

2008-03-29T13:27:00.001-08:00

We went in the wrong direction for about 15 minutes on the highway. We waited at a stoplight for what seemed like an eternity. By the time we reached the Timpanogos Temple, we had to jog in. Out of breath, we whisper-asked where the sealing was and removed our shoes. Luckily, they were not too swamped, and were able to wait for us.

Mom&Pop (Will's parents) were there, all winky and misty-eyed. MetroPink sat at our right, their hands vined and twisted and writhing, the one over and under and around the other...silent, beaming with the thick vibration of their own impending nuptuals.

The ceremony commenced. The officiator was reverent and funny. Suddenly, in the middle of his advice to Jack and Jill, Pink looked ill and Metro arose, excusing the both of them.

We foud out, after the ceremony had completed without them, they had forgotten to obtain their marriage liscence...less than 24 hours before they themselves were to be married. Definitely a story for the grand kids...

"...and that's why my brother was not at my wedding." :)

Jack and Jill

Mom&Pop and Jack and Jill

...Me and Will, Mom&Pop, Jack and Jiil, and Grandma & Grandpa Jill

Timpanogos Temple

The MetroPink Wedding, Part Four

2008-03-13T17:54:00.000-08:00

Next, it was off to the temple! Before we attended Jack and Jill's sealing, we attended a session at the Jordan River Temple.

This was the view from the hill. (can you find the wedding couple???)

Our time together was very special...

...we worked as the witness couple for the very first time!

The view from the hill as we rushed out to make Jack and Jill's sealing on time.

The MetroPink Wedding: Part Three, b

2008-02-18T15:30:00.000-09:00

I am always amazed how an adopted sibling can be so much like blood--and how cute, hyperactive little kids grow into large, beautiful, opinionated...gulp..adults. Nature vs. Nurture--you decide.

Cousin C (pictured here with her two insanely cute daughters)is married to my Cousin. He was nicknamed "Guero" (weh-to) which means "white guy" in Spanish...he's half Mexican, but bears NO resemblance to his siblings. Blonde hair, blue eyes. Both his little girls are bilingual.
In the picture below, his dark-haired girl was singing a little song...ADORABLE!
Guero couldn't be there, unfortunately. He's working on a masters degree. Go Guero!

Thank you so much, Uncle J and Aunt P! (pictured here with their kids)

We had a wonderful night! Hopefully we can have many more burrito-fests like it in the future!

The MetroPink Wedding: Part Three, a

2008-02-18T15:07:00.001-09:00

There's something about interacting with extended family that really helps one feel grounded. My mom's side of the family lives in the Salt Lake City vicinity, so we all had a little get-together at my uncle's house the night we arrived in Utah.
I was very glad that they could meet Will. Honestly, I never got out to Utah very much as a kid, so I didn't grow up with these people. I told Will,

"You and I will be in the same boat...I'll pretty much be meeting them for the first time, too."

By the end of the night, my heart swelled, and I wished with all of my heart that I could have had them around me more, earlier.

Time to start looking for cheap flights.

Introducing my spouse to extended family is like making a huge explanation for all the crazy parts of me without saying a word.

...and also explaining all the beautiful things...

The MetroPink Wedding: Part Two

2008-02-18T13:50:00.001-09:00

As it so-happened, Jack and Jill were getting sealed to each other on this trip as well! (they have been legally married a little over a year--at this point, they were recieving religious marriage ordinances...baffled? Visit this link.)
Here we waited in a shelter in the economy parking section at the airport, still far too early in the morning.

We were getting a little silly at this point. Will took his hat out of his pocket because Jack-BIL said it looked like a growth or a breast all zipped up in Will's chest pocket...that was the last time Will saw his hat, by the way. I had the feeling he would lose it. Jill-SIL was not feeling well, but you couldn't tell...

...did I mention it was really early in the morning?

I checked in under my maiden name because I haven't changed my liscence yet. Threw away my 4oz. container of moiturizer after being hounded like a potential terrorist. Finally, we passed the attractive, gay flight attendants and 45 minutes later, we were in Denver.
During our layover, we enjoyed the carnival rides...

Jill and I just let it take us from here to there, Will (far down, center) made it work for him, and Jack (far right, black jacket) tried to prove his legs would take him faster than us girls standing still.
He didn't seem to care that he didn't get the point--hey, he was beating us.

Will, after a few rides:

Understandably, they are very "Will-oiled"...er, I mean, "well-oiled."

And, modeling a souvier we couln't afford.

But, he's so SEXY!
::Sigh::
Maybe next time.

The MetroPink Wedding: Part One

2008-02-18T09:37:00.000-09:00

We spent the night with Will's grandparents and Jack and Jill.
Arising FAR too early in the morning to a pankake breakfast with eggs.

Grandpa, an old farmer, was up with us...cooking us breakfast.

Grandma said she wouldn't be up to see us leave. Naturally, she got up just after Grandpa and helped him with things he didn't seem to need help with. Someone made the comment, "Someone has to supervise Grandpa to make sure he doesn't set the kitchen on fire."

After breakfast, we packed the car. Me, Will, Jack and Jill all left for the airport together.

The most Wonderfullest Husband of All

2008-01-22T12:27:00.000-09:00

A while ago, I made a quiet personal resolve to handle myself with more grace and decorum. I try to bear my disappointments without dumping them on others. I have discovered this to be a lonely way to deal with life, albeit an impressive facade. But if I can fool those around me into believing I am more-emotionally-stable-than-thou, I am satisfied.

Lately, I've suffered from a lot of possibilities with very few certainties. My husband has witnessed me trying to keep my feelings to myself, often losing that battle. Last night, I was trying to toughen up and "take it like a woman," but Will sensed my intense frustration and offered sincere, unsolicited empathy--instantly filling my need to be validated and quieting my spirit. Apparently, all I needed to know was that is was okay to feel the way I was feeling...most amazing of all, he never told me to 'get over myself.' Which surprisingly, helped me to let it all go much sooner.

I just wanted to publicly praise Will for being the Most Wonderfulest Husband--it's not every day one finds a man who knows how to tame a bawling, hormonal monster with only a few words and and a vat full of love.

Cereal and Baby Names at 2AM

2008-01-18T13:09:00.000-09:00

Will passed his interview with flying colors, but the company failed theirs. They didn't really have any solid position to offer him, and they didn't have insurance benefits. After thinking seriously about it, Will decided to turn them down. It isn't wise for us to lose health benefits right now, and we have other options that would allow us to save a lot of money without leaving our city.

Yesterday, Will had a very long nap. Consequently, he woke up at 2AM and couldn't get back to sleep. So he started talking to me. It was fun, even tho I was very tired...kinda like a slumber party. He told me he had found an error in our favor on the bank balance and he bought groceries while I was sleeping. We revised the names of some of our children and talked again about his interview. He brought me cereal and milk to help settle my stomach.

I expressed my belief that we were being divinely led to the places we needed to be. Will is a lot like me, in that he changes his circumstances, thinking that will fix the void inside him. Will feels like his life is going nowhere--but instead of taking the quickest route to actual change, he has allowed himself to become distracted by occupations in which he can easily succeed. Thus, he feels like he is achieving, but truly, he's getting nowhere.

I know what that is like. I have been job hopping all my adult life, leaving jobs at which I was very good at the peak of my performance claiming to move on. Actually, I was making a lateral move; nothing more than a change of scenery. It made me feel challenged for a while but only postponed the attainment of my dreams.

In short, the both of us are afraid to fail. We want to be safe above all. We want to be loved and appreciated. We don't want to fall on our faces or get made fun of for trying. Will and I are both very talented people. We always have been. I pray that we might be able to encourage each other and muster the strength and meager resources to allow ourselves to bloom.

I think refusing this job is a step in the right direction. One step closer to really, really doing it this time.

PROGRESS!

2008-01-10T13:01:00.000-09:00

SalsaG, a good friend of ours, recently became an apartment manager in a town about an hour away. Earlier this week, she told us another manager position had opened up for the apartment complex down the street from her, and she enthusiastically recommended Will for the position. I called Will at his second job and asked,
“Hey Will, how would you like $-,000 per month and free rent?”
He responded with animation and sent in his resume that very night. Even the next morning he would smile to himself and quietly chant “free rent!”

We tried our best not to get too excited about it…actually, only I was trying. Will has been bubbling with anticipation. I, the cynical one, have been moderating my expressions of desire. I don’t like getting my hopes up and having them crash.

Will got a call today—he has a conference call with this company tomorrow!

I have allowed my excitement to go up by a few degrees. (lol) Perhaps tomorrow I can throw off the coat and do a little dancin’ with SalsaG!

BIL’s and SIL’s

2008-01-09T08:18:00.000-09:00

Brief update of relation nicknames:

(I’m about to acquire another sister-in-law [SIL] so I have to start making distinctions)

Jack and Jill (mentioned a few months ago) are now:
‘Jack-BIL’, ‘Jill-SIL’ or ‘Jack and Jill’

Our new-comers will be:
‘Metro-BIL’, ‘Pink-SIL’ or ‘MetroPink’…and they’re not quite married yet, so right now, they’re ‘pre-MetroPink’

Pink-pre-SIL is named after her favorite color; Metro-BIL is named for his uncannily sharp sense of fashion. Jack and Jill were thus named for how they ‘fell’ in love.

Why all the nicknames? Well, I could give the excuse that "I work for a law-enforcement agency, and I've heard too many stories..." which is partially true. But actually, I just love to nickname people. Wouldn't that be an intersting post?

LOL

Keeping Perspective

2008-01-07T08:03:00.000-09:00

Will placed a few applications this weekend. We will be anxiously waiting for a response. Depending on which job is interested, that will determine where we move and how soon. I'm trying to keep my mind wrapped around our plan, and not focus on all the other things up in the air.

Poor Will--he has acknowledged that attending school will probably have to be postponed for another few months until January of 2009. That is our absolute deadline, tho. He's going crazy staring 30 in the face without a degree. We're hoping that he is able to find a job that will allow me to get some school under my belt this year--possibly this summer.

I'm also trying to keep the idea of pregnancy in perspective as well. Trying to reassure myself that if we do get pregnant, there's plenty of other women who have gone to school in that condition. Will is not going to let me fall on my face.

I'm trying to be excited instead of scared. My uncle once told me he looked at life as an adventure he intended to share with his wife. Not an unending succession of miserable experiences in which they were trapped. Since he said that to me, he has really been through a lot--including a layoff and two years of unemployment. But he and his wife have weathered it and everything has mended itself. I wonder, if while he was falling so hard so fast, he held up his arms and screamed with delight...

Flip Flop

2007-12-26T18:38:00.000-09:00

Christmas was okay, but we spread ourselves very thin. With all the mental sensations we endured that week, I can’t really say that the entire duration of the holiday was pleasant. One way or another, we managed to have a Merry Christmas and spend a lot of time with his family. I’ll leave it at that.

Now, we’re trying to discipline ourselves not to spend money eating out. I feel like we’re on Oprah’s “Debt Diet.” We should deny ourselves the eating out for the sake of our real diets.

We’re also caught in the flip flop between Nebraska and Kansas. Where should we be this next year? We just don’t know! What happened to Alaska for the summer? Good question! At this point, I have no idea where we will land. Will is talking about going to Nebraska as soon as possible. He found a job up there very similar to the one he currently has here in Kansas. I was suggesting that we stay here in Kansas to get rid of debt, move to Nebraska and start school in January. Now, I’m starting to see his point of view. I really don’t want to wait any longer to move our lives ahead.

Others our age are buying houses and excelling at their careers and finishing their Masters Degrees. We feel a little behind things. I make light of it, but it really is hitting us hard. Both of us have issues from our past that have taken us 10 years to work through. We are emotionally ready to do all the things our peers are doing, but have no resources to do it with. We don’t want to say it to each other, but it will be another 10 years before we have what our peers have now. We will always be behind, and that is all there is to it.

At our age, it’s difficult to justify the risk of time and money and health benefits, but at this point, what choice do we have?

COWABUNGA!

The Christmas Tree

2007-12-22T07:13:00.000-09:00

(Our current tree--I got a digital camera for Christmas a few days early!)

So we finally dragged out the tree I had purchased for his birthday.

Will put on every string of lights we owned, every ornament we owned, and bought the biggest angel he could find and swallowed the top of the tree with it. I tried to tolerate it for as long as I could. Unfortunately, my husband is very sensible of my displeasure and could tell I hated the way it looked. He told me to re-do the tree.

I did gladly, tho it took me and entire evening. Now, it has only blue lights, blue ribbon, orange bulbs, blue bulbs, gold bows and orange-y candy canes. I purchased sculpting materials so that I could make my own angel to go on top of the tree. When we decide to have an angel, that is. Even tho Will is an angel guy, he agreed that the tree wanted a star.

Well, off to sculpting!

Coo-Coo for Christmas

2007-12-22T06:31:00.000-09:00

Will has decided to give his siblings a taste of the Christmases he used to enjoy as a kid when his parents were a little less strapped for cash. I smile as I watch him excitedly prepare. When Will found out that he had Christmas Eve off from his second job, he practically jumped up and down on the bed--he was so excited! Husbands really are big kids.

Husbands often take on big worries too. Will can't stand his day job--mostly for the unattainable goals they set for him and the inefficient, unprofessional management. He wants out so bad that he has asked about full time positions at the department store where he works in the evening. He has several years in retail management and honestly is just born to be a manager.

What about Architectural Engineering? Well, apparently he's willing to give at least a year to managing and then go back to school. A management position with this company would probably involve moving to a different state. Hey, I'm all for it! I just want out of here! We would have to change our plans for AK and school entirely, but it would settle my husband's mind.

I completely believe in Will's ability to become an Architect, but the more time I spend with im, the more I believe that he would feel more fulfilled managing stuff and climbing a corporate ladder. What others see as a self-centered rat race, Will sees as an opportunity to administer good business. Honestly, I think he would have more fun taking over K-Mart than designing buildings. It will be interesting watching him discover himself.